Fuck my life.

Seriously, why am I so stupid?
Why did I even expect him to talk to me?
It's not even him that I'm upset over, it's just the fact I'm so stupid.
I let him ruin my whole night.
I barely enjoyed the dance because of it.
And I started crying when "Just the way you are" started playing. And basically ran to the washroom.
I'm just so dumb...

"Come to Ottawa on Friday, and I'll save you a dance"
I really wish I could go. I really want to just get away from everything for a bit...
But sadly, I can't :/
And that makes me more upset.
I'm glad Aria is always there when I need to talk to him,
he told me to call him, because he hates seeing me like this,
he said to call in fifteen minutes, so I'm waiting...
I just wish he was here. D:

I hate my mind, it makes me think the worst of everything. Even though I would like to just be happy sometimes, my mind won't allow it.
It thinks too much about people hating me, and everyone ignoring me, when, in reality, no one hates me nor is ignoring me. And I know that. But my mind just wants me to think so.
And that's why I always say I hate my life, because I hate my mind, and the way it just hates me, and wants me to be depressed. I can't help the things I say, or anything.
I'm actually just so stupid...
This is honestly the slowest eight minutes of my life....

I really hope my calling card still works o.o;
I haven't used it for awhile...

*deepsigh*
I go upstairs, and take these leaves out of my hair, wash off my makeup, get changed, there's a possible chance of tears, and then I call Aria Adel.
11:11...*wishes*
Okay, now I leave...
Have a nice day, everyone...